so I heard the greatest news ever to come out of the Washington Nationals baseball club: they traded Ryan Church. Church was an absolute chump, my (and a bunch of my friends') least favorite Nat by far. He had mediocre stats (his .272 with 70 rbis last season), is getting up there at 28, and was so un-clutch player it was out of control. It seemed like any time I watched him and there were men on base he'd either strike out (107 on the year, 2nd on the team) or hit into a double play. When he was up with one or two outs you might as well go to the bathroom or get some food.

He ruined a no-hitter by the Nats awhile ago by flubbing a play in the outfield and tearing his pants in the process, and was just generally crummy. There was some other game I was at when the Nats were tied or ahead and they put Church in the outfield. I said something like "well there goes the game, Church is in." He then flubbed a play, made a bad throw, and lo and behold the Nats were down. I screamed "CHURCH YOU SUCK!" (I was sitting in the front row) and I think he heard me. Statistics just don't show his terribleness.

For example, here is a typical Church play, from DCist
Ramon Ortiz threw a potential double-play ball into center field, allowing a run to score, and Ryan Church nearly fell down fielding a ball in center—turning a 1-run single into a 2-run double.
I said many many times during the season that they should trade Church for a box of balls or a couple of bags of grass seed or a pizza, so it's not really important who the Nats got. However, this was actually good too, as the team received Lastings Milledge from the Mets, who is a young and gifted, but apparently kind of troubled, outfielder. The Yahoo article says his teammates didn't like him much and posted a note in their locker room (when they were at RFK coincidentally) that said "Know your place rook -Your Teammates." But hopefully he can get that stuff in line. Dmitri Young had some issues before he came to the Nats but has been fine since he arrived, and is a fan favorite. Apparently Church is going to start for the Mets in right field. Sorry Mets, welcome to suck.

The only bad part about the trade is that the Nats gave up Brian Scheider, a gritty catcher who, unlike Church, got a lot of clutch hits. He also seemed to handle the pitching staff well. I guess that means youngster Jesus Flores will catch. Flores was decent offensively in his limited time, but I thought Schneider was better with the pitchers and defensively.

And apparently the Nats are looking into Andruw Jones and Corey Patterson, which would be cool.

But who cares, Church is gone!

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