5/30/2004

so i keep getting the stupidest spam. luckily my filter gets most of it, but i still can't understand how people would open this stuff. For one thing, they are always from bizarre random names, like Winfred Taitague or Hilda Nesby. "Ooh, Uncle Winfred wrote me a letter!" What are the odds that any of those names will be recognizable to anybody? It sounds like the Belgian Embassy staff or something. And now they've started to try to avoid the spam filters by having really bizarre subjects, like "disambiguate Ci@lis". Is that really a good sales pitch? Even if I were looking for Cialis, I probably wouldn't click on it if it had an @ symbol instead of an A, and I have no clue what disambiguate means. It sounds like it'll make something fall off, which I think is the opposite of what Cialis does. When i looked it up, it means "state unambiguously or remove ambiguities from." Which is kind of funny, considering what it's attached to.

And then there are the spams with ... in between words, which make the subjects sound like someone doing a William Shatner impression, "Look..younger Be..more Active." I can hear Shatner saying that. However, the divisions of words sometimes make the subject mean the opposite, such as "Bigger..larger in 30days..or Less." I assume this is supposed to mean you can get a bigger ding-dong in 30 days or less, but the way it's written, it looks like you can either "get a bigger ding dong in 30 days, or maybe a smaller one." I mean, i guess there's no smart way to make spam, except for maybe random normal names "Steve Jones" rather than bizarro ones like "Marlana Knapko" and have subjects that have good grammar and no misspellings. Or maybe mention stuff I like in them. I would click "Beer from all over the world!" for example, or "I saw your resume on Hotjobs," since I, and probably lots of other folks, have a resume on there. Of course, you might get sued if you used a company name like that, but I think it's pretty clear that spammers don't care for the law much anyway. Otherwise they wouldn't be sending me emails for their products, they'd be selling them in stores.

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