so the phrase "I feel badly" bothers me. I hear people say it sometimes and now it's on TV a lot in a commercial for some new show called "Desparate Housewives" (which is not porn, even though it sounds like it). This guy says "you tried to kill me," and a woman, who I assume is a desparate housewife, says "And I feel badly about that." However, she is really saying "And I am not capable of feeling about that" or "And my sense of touch doesn't work about that." I assume people say "I feel badly" instead of "I feel bad" because they think it's proper grammar or makes them sound smart, but it ain't not right. (ha)

Badly is an adverb, meaning it modifies the verb, such as "I run quickly." How do you run? Quickly. So when you say "I feel badly," you are modifying the verb "feel." You are describing the manner in which you feel something, not describing your emotion. Does that make sense? You don't say "I feel angrily," right? If you say "I run badly" it means you aren't a good runner. So when you say "I feel badly," it means you aren't a good feeler.

Here's a page that gives an in-depth grammar reason for "I feel badly" being wrong
http://www.grammartips.homestead.com/badly.html

so one of the people in the cubicle next to mine is undercutting the vending machine. I think that's pretty funny, she has a big thing of candy and cookies and it's all cheaper. It's a good idea, smallish Snickers bars are 75 cents in the vending machine. It's supposedly for some charity, but I don't really care as I am cheap, and it's a gold mine anyway. I should go to Price Club and buy a ton of candy to sell and say it's for the Little Lebowski Urban Achievers or something. Then I will watch the VH1 rich celebrity shows and do what they do.

(in the fake-Robin Leach voice from those VH1 shows)
"When you want to stay at the best Hamptons beach hideaways like P. Diddy and J. Lo, first you must have money like P. Diddy and J. Lo! Andrew Wiseman got it by selling candy to his coworkers!"

so i was thinking: the phrase "eat your heart out" doesn't make any sense. i mean, since when does being embarassed or have somebody do better than you make somebody want to eat their heart? "gee, you are a better actor than I am, I'd better tear my heart out and eat it, rather than work to become a better actor," or whatever. but then again, the only place i ever see this phrase is in the news, as a headline or some kind of catchphrase.

I found this "origin" on a site that has origins of different idioms, but I am not convinced.

Heart is also defined as the central, core, or inner most part of an object (or person). To eat the heart out is to remove the core or most important part, a part that will surely be missed.
The phrase is probably a shortened way of saying "This will eat your heart out".
Alternatively,
Adapted from the 16th century "eat one's own heart", meaning to suffer from silent grief or vexation. It also has roots in the Biblical phrase, "to eat one’s own flesh", used to describe an indolent person.
Thanks to Mike Pierce

(http://members.aol.com/MorelandC/HaveOrigins.htm)

So I am having some problems with the vending machine at work. The machine has ten slots, A1-A10, B1-B10, etc. but it’s weird because there are buttons 1-9 and then a “10” button that you have to hit for slot 10. However, I keep forgetting this, so whenever I want to get the Twix or whatever is in B10 I hit B then 1 and then 0, and end up with the shitty Andy Capps Hot Fries from B1. What is this, a Chinese keyboard? Why not just have 100 buttons, “B1” “B2” “B3” if you are going to make it that complicated. Or just a button that says what you are getting, like “Twix” or “shitty Andy Capps Hot Fries (don’t hit for Twix).”

so I went to see Camera Obscura yesterday at Iota in Clarendon, and it was a good show. I'd heard they sound a lot like Belle and Sebastian, but I didn't really think that was the case. I guess people think that because they are similar to Belle and Sebastian in appearance and stuff: they're also Scottish, they have a lot of band members, they play acoustic stuff and the organ, and their songs are pretty soft, but the music didn't sound much like them. Anyway, it was a good show, and I recommend checking them out. And their new album is called "Underachievers Please Try Harder," which I think is a pretty great title. And Iota is a pretty neat little venue, except I got in trouble because I tried to put my beer on my friend's tab, but her tab was at the other bar, so they came and found me and made me pay. Weird, you'd think a tab could be used at either bar inside the place. Oh well.

so i complain about spam a lot and how stupid it is. i just found this great site called "Spamusement," which is cartoons inspired by actual spam subject lines. it's pretty hilarious.

http://www.spamusement.com

so this is mainly for me, it's my list of concerts i want to go to, because i always forget them.

X Th July 29, Measles Mumps Rubella, warehouse next door

Sat July 31, Assrockers, Velvet Lounge - free beer

X Mon Aug 2, Camera Obscura, $12, Iota

X MON AUG 16- ELEFANT, AMBULANCE LTD., ELKLAND $10 Black Cat mainstage 8:30

Sat Aug 21- Enon, El Guapo, Warehouse next door

SUN AUG 22- MAE, THE WORKING TITLE, WAKING ASHLAND $10 Black Cat mainstage 8:30

TUE AUG 24- Further Seems Forever w/ The Kicks • Brandston • Salem 7pm Doors $12.00 9:30 Club (I'm only going to see the Kicks, people.)

SAT AUG 28- BAD WIZARD, ASSROCKERS, THE WITNESSES $8 Black Cat mainstage 9:30

THUR SEPT 9- LES SAVY FAV, DETACHMENT KIT $12 mainstage 8:30 Black Cat

SAT SEP 11, Guided By Voices w/ Tommy Keene $20.00 9:30 Club

>SAT SEPT 18- THE THRILLS, THE ZUTONS $14 mainstage 9:30 Black Cat

SUN SEP 26, Old 97's w/ Chuck Prophet $20.00, 9:30 Club

TUES SEPT 28 Keane w/ French Kicks Presented by 99.1 WHFS. 7pm Doors $15.00 9:30 Club

WED SEPT 29- RJD2, DIPLO (of Hollertronics) $12 Black Cat mainstage 8:30

>SUN OCT 10- RILO KILEY, NOW IT’S OVERHEAD, TILLY AND THE WALL $12 Black Cat mainstage 8:30

>MON OCT 11- MOUNTAIN GOATS, JOHN VANDERSLICE, JOAN OF ARC $10 Black Cat mainstage 8:30

>TUE OCT 12 Camper van Beethoven $20.00 930 Club

>SUN OCT 17 The Faint w/ TV on the Radio & Beep Beep $15.00 9:30 Club

>TUE OCT 19 The Libertines w/ Radio 4 $15.00 9:30 Club

MON OCT 25- PINBACK, MATES OF STATE, ASPECTS OF PHYSICS $14 mainstage Black Cat 8:30

So I found a bunch of cool new videos on Yahoo Launch, check em out:

Chromeo, a NY hipster-type 80s electronic funk group. The video is really funny: http://search.launch.yahoo.com/search/lsearch/all?p=chromeo

The Thrills, the Irish band I reviewed earlier. Big Sur is a pretty amusing video, haven’t seen the other one yet (I’m at work and trying to be stealthy):
http://launch.yahoo.com/artist/videos.asp?artistID=1099693

Here’s about 800 Beastie Boys videos, which are usually hilarious. Triple Trouble at the bottom is a new one, with my favorite legendary monster, Sasquatch:
http://search.launch.yahoo.com/search/lsearch/video?p=beastie+boys

So what I think is funny and stupid is commercials that edit songs so they sound like the opposite of their actual meaning. The first time I noticed this was “American Woman” by the Guess Who, which was used in an ad for Tommy Hilfiger or American Eagle or something like that. The song is a protest song from the Vietnam era against the U. S., but it was edited so it sounded like it was glorifying American women. Then there was another Tommy Hilfiger commercial that edited “Fortunate Son” by CCR, which is about the sons of rich and powerful people avoiding Vietnam, to sound like it was a patriotic song. They only played “some folks are born, made to raise the flag, oooh that red white and blue,” but they edited out the next line of the song, “And when the band plays ‘Hail to the Chief’ They point the cannon right at you,” as well as all of the draft-dodging stuff. I assume bands do this solely for the money, or maybe they lost control of the rights to their songs, but I think it really sucks, both that the song is being used for basically the opposite of what it means, and that ad people assume we don’t know what the song is about. Either that or the ad people are bad listeners and only notice the very brief parts that they can use, which would not surprise me. Recently, I saw an ad for a cruise or something with Iggy Pop’s “Lust for Life,” which I am pretty sure is about drug addiction, and a car commercial which took one line from the Dandy Warhols' “Bohemian Like You,” which is a sarcastic song that makes fun of young people who are trying to be cool bohemians. Neither of which are things that people selling stuff would want to be associated with, you would think. “Hey, if you guy this car you are a poser! Come on this cruise and do heroin!” But I guess it’s easier to cut up a song by an actual band than to make a catchy song yourself.

so I found a couple of cool websites. the first is an awesome video of a guy playing Mario Brothers music on the piano.

http://media.ebaumsworld.com/mariopiano.wmv

the other is a funny blog called 8th Pres in Da House, a guy pretending to be Martin Van Buren coming back to life and talking about funny crap.

http://8thpresindahouse.blogspot.com/